Grandpa's chicken

I do so love my Grandpa's chicken - we all do!  This is more of a braised chicken breast - but we always called it Grandpa's chicken because that is what my Grandma always called it.  She said it was my Grandfather's favorite chicken!

4 chicken breasts - cut to be no thicker than 1/2 inch thick and now bigger than a deck of cards.  I usually get 8 to 10 pieces out of four chicken breasts.
Flour
Eggs - beaten
garlic powder
bread crumbs
salt
pepper
Parsley
onion powder
chili powder
oil
water - 1 to 2 cups

set out two plates and a bowl.  In the bowl beat 2-3 eggs.  On one plate just put flour.  On other plate put flour and all seasoning.  Mix well. 

Put oil in large pan - heat until hot.  Take each chicken breast -first coat with just flour mixture, then put in beaten eggs, finally cover in flour spice mixture.  Fry until brown.

Once browned put in baking dish.  When all chicken is brown and in baking dish you make a pan gravy out of drippings in the frying pan you just used.  To do this - have pan still be hot.  Had water to pan and drippings - wisking it together.  It will be hot!  When all drippings have been mixed with water - pour over chicken in baking dish.

Pre-heat oven to 350.  Cover baking dish.  Bake for one hour.

Chili

Here is my chili recipe  Pretty easy!

Diced tomatoes - 4 cans (with juices!)
Dark red kidney beans - 2 cans - drained
Light red kidney beans - 2 cans - drained
Onion - 1 - chopped
Garlic - 4 cloves - minced
Ground beef - 1 1/2 pound
Taco seasoning - two packets or 1/2 cup homemade
chili powder - 2 T

Brown ground beef and chopped onion together.  Drain.

Put all ingredients in crock pot.  Cook in high for 8 hours.  Add extra chili powder and taco seasoning 1/2 hour before serving, if desired.  We eat this over corn chips with shredded cheese on top.

Bean soup

This is my bean soup recipe - everyone loves it.

Ham bone  and fat from cooked ham- 1
Left over ham - diced - 2 cups
Navy beans or northern beans - 2 pounds
onion
Bacon - 1 pound
Salt and pepper - to taste

Boil clean ham bone and fat for four hours.  Remove bones and fat - save broth.
 Prepare dried beans according to package to cooking stage.  Add beans and chopped onion to ham broth.  Cook for two hours - until beans are desired consistency.    

Fry or broil bacon.  Chop. 

Before serving add bacon, diced ham, salt, and pepper to broth.  Stir and serve hot.

Mashed potato pancakes

This is my Grandmother's mashed potato pancake recipe!

4 cups left over mashed potatoes.
2 tsp garlic powder
1 cup shredded cheese
flour
salt
2 eggs - beaten
oil (I prefer bacon fat for this recipe)

Mix mashed potatoes, garlic powder and cheese together.  Make patties. 

Mix flour and salt together.  Dredge each patty in flour, then beaten egg and then back in flour again.  Fry in oil until crispy.

Meatballs over noodles - recipe

Here is an easy recipe that works well for cook outs or just an easy night meal.

Frozen meatballs (1/2 of a large bag)
Cream of mushroom soup - 2 cans
Brown gravy mix - 2 powders - I get Wal-Mart brand
Milk - 1 cup
Noodles - 1 1/2 pound

This will serve six people with leftovers.

Put frozen meatballs in crock pot.  Cover with mushroom soup, gravy powder and milk.  Stir.  Cook on low for 4-6 hours.

Cook noodles according to package.  Drain.  Serve meatballs over noodles.

Life moves on. . .

It has been a rough weekend - for many reasons.

Today as I was going around the day in my despair a thought crossed my mind - a thought that brought more tears and panic in my stomach.  It it me that life just continues to move on, even when those we love aren't here anymore.  Forward it moves - without them.  Forward - like a car stuck in drive down a hill. . . always forward.

2 years and 7 months have passed since Grandma died.  2 years and 7 months. . . . Life has continued.  Babies have been born.  Marriages have fallen apart.  Her home is crumbling apart with no one in it to love it.  My life has turned into my own version of hell - and she is not here to share any of this with.  The one person I need more than anyone on this planet is gone forever - and I am sick about it.  2 years and 7 months and it still hurts so much to not have her here.

I think of her so much lately.  I think of those long winters with her alone.  No car.  No way to visit anyone - just hoping someone she loves would stop or call.  I think of that day my Aunt Mary died, she said my Grandpa could feel the life leave her hands and asked her to go get the doctor.  I think of the strength she must have had to keep going.  I think of her as a child, cold, hungry, and abused.  I think of that day when my Grandpa died.  My Grandpa, her rock, her only family, and he died leaving her with three little kids.  I remember her talking about how hard it was to have to go home and tell them that their Daddy wasn't ever going to come home again.  I am so trying to draw from her strength. . . .

God I miss her so much.  Sometimes I just want to scream and break things. I want to be able to sit by her grave and talk to her - but I can't.

Homesick. . .

It has been a rough week.  Not sure why.  Maybe it has been the full moon.  Maybe it is because it is just hot, humid and miserable here AGAIN.  Maybe it is because I had to stay home a few days this week instead of volunteering at the school - and when I am alone the real sadness and depression kicks in.  Maybe it is because it is fall, my favorite time of year, yet here fall is the same as every other season. . . . hot and humid.  Whatever the reason - this week has been rough.

As a child I read the story of Heidi.  I read how she missed her mountains so much that she was actually physically ill.  I read it, but really didn't get it.  I do now.

Here we are - in Florida.  A place where a soldier during the Seminole war once wrote "If the Devil owned both Hell and Florida, he would rent out Florida and live in Hell!"  Every moment I am here I feel a piece of me die.  A piece of who I am as a person.  What I stand for.  I can not exist here as who I am. . . . I either have to change myself or just hide away from everyone.  A place where everything I love does not exist (except my husband and kids).  I hate living here with every ounce of who I am.  The climate is horrible (I thought the cold was terrible - but this non-stop heat and humidity can drive one mad!)  The people are so not who I am - they are either scary (the vast majority of the freaky stories you hear on the news come from Florida), closed minded beyond belief, or immoral.  The bugs - they are everywhere.  Compounded to that is the fact that I am deathly allergic to fireants - and they are everywhere outside - thus even if I did want to suck it up and deal with the heat and humidity to go outside I have to live in constant fear of fireants. . . .

Florida - where if you have no extra money there really is NOTHING to do.  Everything costs money.  Everything.  Going to the beach you have to pay to park.  Going to a farm in the fall to look at animals and you have to pay just to get in.  Walking into the county fair just to look at the animals is going to cost you $50.  Everyone loves Florida because there is "so much to do" here, but I can tell you that if you don't have extra money then there is NOTHING to do in Florida.

Florida is 1400 miles from my family.  I miss my family.  I miss them so much it hurts.  I miss seasons.  I miss change.  I even miss the snow (OK -not 6 months of snow - but I miss snow).  I miss just being able to sit on my Grandma's porch and watch the cars drive by.  I miss the festivals, the hiking trails, the fall colors, the excitement of change and the holiday season.  Florida has none of that.  My kids, I love them, but nothing is ever good enough for them.  They always find something to complain and fight about - from what I am making for dinner to what we are watching on TV.  There is no joy down here in Florida - in the house or out of the house.

Everyday I long for home. . . .  I know this is where my family is and this is what I should consider my home, but I don't.  Being here makes me physically and emotionally ill.  Everyday that I am here another part of me dies. . . . I keep thinking that tomorrow has to be better than today. . . but it never is.  It is just another day living in my hell.  I keep waiting for something really bad to happen - one of the kids to get sick or killed - my husband to be killed on his way home from work. . . . that is what Florida is . . . nothing but bad.

I am afraid that I will never leave this place.  That every day will just be like it is - an day worse than the one before.  A day with no joy or happiness - another day where another piece of me dies.  I fear that I will die down here and that my body will spend eternity in this place - slowly rotting forever in my hell. . .

I am ashamed for how I feel.  I didn't like the long winters of Michigan - they depressed me as well.  My husband has a job that he loves down here.  My kids are doing OK down here.  I know my family would be happy down here if it weren't for me.  They like the beaches.  Gabe loves Florida.  Nick has a job that he really likes.  The girls are the girls - they miss Michigan but they are fine where ever. . .  It is me.  Maybe I am not meant to be happy and I just need to accept my lot in life.

I can say though that I do fully understand Heidi now.  I miss home.  I miss the feel of home.  I miss family and holidays with my family (even if they did drive me crazy!)  I hope and pray I get to see Michigan again someday . . . I do so hate it here.